In recent years, therapeutic terms like “manipulation,” “gaslighting,” and various diagnostic labels have become part of everyday conversation. While raising awareness about mental health is important, the casual misuse of these terms can dilute their meaning and, more worryingly, endanger others.
The Problem with Mislabeling
When terms like “narcissist” or “gaslighting” are used loosely, they can lose their clinical significance. For example, calling someone a narcissist because they exhibit selfish behavior ignores the complex criteria required for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Similarly, labeling disagreements or misunderstandings as “gaslighting” can trivialize the serious psychological abuse the term originally described.
This overuse can harm relationships, stigmatize individuals, and prevent people from getting the professional help they need. When diagnostic terms are thrown around carelessly, those truly suffering from mental health issues may feel invalidated or misunderstood. It can also lead to false accusations, damaging trust and communication between people.
How It Endangers Others
Misusing these terms doesn’t just dilute their meaning; it can also endanger others. For example, accusing someone of being manipulative or gaslighting without fully understanding the context can escalate conflicts and create unnecessary hostility. This can result in serious social consequences, from strained relationships to workplace discrimination.
Additionally, the use of terms based in incorrect information can lead to mismanagement of mental health concerns. It is important that the meaning behind words continue to carry their weight and effectively communicate the severity of an experience or situation. This dilution or twisting of terms can prevent someone from accessing the appropriate treatment or support they need.
A Call for Caution and Compassion
As therapists, we advocate for increased awareness and understanding of mental health. Instead of jumping to conclusions or labeling behaviors with clinical terms, let’s promote open, honest communication and encourage people to seek professional guidance when they’re struggling.
By being mindful of our language, we can help preserve the integrity of these important concepts and protect the mental health and well-being of ourselves and others.
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For readers seeking more information or guidance on mental health topics, consider scheduling an appointment with one of our therapists who can provide professional insight tailored to your individual needs. You can book an appointment by calling (352) 363- 1998.
Misusing clinical terms doesn’t just dilute their meaning; it can also endanger others. For example, accusing someone of being manipulative or gaslighting without fully understanding the context can escalate conflicts and create unnecessary hostility. This can result in serious social consequences, from strained relationships to workplace discrimination.
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Happy Friday of the world’s longest week. Was this the world’s longest week? It seemed like it.
Maybe the loooong week got me thinking about a more bite-sized book. Or at least one with short chapters you can read in small doses as the mood hits you.
I thought about which books made a surprising and lasting impact on me, that also could be useful in this time of the Great Pause. And Write It Down, Make It Happen called out to me from the bookshelf.
Yep, it’s got some of that gushy self help enthusiasm spilling off the pages…but take a look anyway. It’s worth it. Like I said, surprising.
Write It Down Make It Happen came into my life when I felt lost and was trying to forge my way in a new land (California) and a new professional career (post-Master’s social work).
I needed some tools and some structure to get where I wanted to go, at that time. (It was another Great Pause in my life, come to think of it).
In the mail came this deceptively simple book. Henriette Anne Klauser is best known for her book Writing on Both Sides of the Brain, the classic book on writing, creativity and understanding resistance and procrastination.
WIDMIH, on the other hand, is about how writing itself — in any form — is a simple tool that activates the reticular activating system (RAS) of your brain (and puts your subconscious to work for you), promotes clarity, spurs courage, finds creative solutions, and in general gets life moving for you. Here’s her description of RAS:
The RAS is like a filtering system of the brain. Writing it down sets up the filter. If you’ve never owned a blue Honda before, and you buy a blue Honda, all of a sudden you see blue Hondas all over town. You might wonder, Where are all these blue Hondas coming from? But they were there all along, you were just not paying attention to them.
Putting a goal in writing is like buying a blue Honda; it sets up a filer that helps you be aware of certain things in your surroundings. Writing triggers the RAS, which in turn sends a signal to the cerebral cortex: “Wake up! Pay attention! Don’t miss this detail!” Once you write down a goal, the brain works overtime to see you get it, and will alert you to the signs and signals that, like the blue Honda, were there all along.
I heeded the book’s advice and over the past 20 years or so I’ve probably used every suggestion in this book. Journaling, of course (off and on). Writing down goals. Keeping a compliment file. “Polishing coconuts” (you’ll have to read in the book about that one). Writing near water. Writing reverse stories. Writing letters to the future. Making lists. And more.
But the biggest impact has been what Klauser calls a “What by When” group. This is a group (it could be just you and one person…or a few more) that meets to share personal goals, write them down, and be accountable to each other.
I’ve got 2 of these in my life: one that officially meets once a year (in January, to set intentions –and systems!– for the new year, with sporadic check ins thereafter) and one that for years has met monthly for breakfast (now we meet monthly on WhatsApp). We set goals, discuss progress, make personal commitments to ourselves with witnesses…and then meet again to see how it all went. We express fears, empathize, cheerlead one another, and remind each other that even when we fall short of a goal we’ve still made baby steps worth celebrating–or perhaps found new goals. It is the best kind of support, kindness and community. I would not own the business I have today without it. This kind of group support that changes lives.
So as we find our way through this new terrain of our lives — and I know that many of you are thinking about what you want life to look like on the other side of COVID-19 — why not get specific and write it down? I promise this book will help you do it, have fun while you do — and also make a difference in what life on the flip side looks like.
Have a great weekend!
Be well, wash your hands, and stay connected–
Lisa
