Poetry Monday 3/30/2020
March 30, 2020

In recent years, therapeutic terms like “manipulation,” “gaslighting,” and various diagnostic labels have become part of everyday conversation. While raising awareness about mental health is important, the casual misuse of these terms can dilute their meaning and, more worryingly, endanger others.

The Problem with Mislabeling

When terms like “narcissist” or “gaslighting” are used loosely, they can lose their clinical significance. For example, calling someone a narcissist because they exhibit selfish behavior ignores the complex criteria required for a diagnosis of Narcissistic Personality Disorder. Similarly, labeling disagreements or misunderstandings as “gaslighting” can trivialize the serious psychological abuse the term originally described.

This overuse can harm relationships, stigmatize individuals, and prevent people from getting the professional help they need. When diagnostic terms are thrown around carelessly, those truly suffering from mental health issues may feel invalidated or misunderstood. It can also lead to false accusations, damaging trust and communication between people.

How It Endangers Others

Misusing these terms doesn’t just dilute their meaning; it can also endanger others. For example, accusing someone of being manipulative or gaslighting without fully understanding the context can escalate conflicts and create unnecessary hostility. This can result in serious social consequences, from strained relationships to workplace discrimination.

Additionally, the use of terms based in incorrect information can lead to mismanagement of mental health concerns. It is important that the meaning behind words continue to carry their weight and effectively communicate the severity of an experience or situation. This dilution or twisting of terms can prevent someone from accessing the appropriate treatment or support they need.

A Call for Caution and Compassion

As therapists, we advocate for increased awareness and understanding of mental health. Instead of jumping to conclusions or labeling behaviors with clinical terms, let’s promote open, honest communication and encourage people to seek professional guidance when they’re struggling.

By being mindful of our language, we can help preserve the integrity of these important concepts and protect the mental health and well-being of ourselves and others.

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For readers seeking more information or guidance on mental health topics, consider scheduling an appointment with one of our therapists who can provide professional insight tailored to your individual needs. You can book an appointment by calling (352) 363- 1998.

 

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Hey Everyone, 

Here’s the first installment of what I promised last week in my blog and newsletter* — to share the things I’m leaning into for grounding and perspective during this pandemic time.

I came across this poem from Emily Rosen, who is the Director of the Institute for the Psychology of Eating, and want to share with you — because it made me feel less alone, more understood, and more hopeful (and I hope the same for you). 

this is big

and so small

so loud and stunningly silent

as it screams through

systems nervous

policies strict

stories sold

and plans possible

leaving little trace

for a week or two

until the tracks

become visible

and pandemonium ensues

and

it’s done

the impossible

it’s stopped us

we have been stopped

in some very significant ways

we have stopped

and slowed

way down

we have

slowed

suspending

all not necessary

as inside

we must go

we are being

forced inward

a place

many of us

fear more than

the coughing, sneezing

and difficulty breathing

we’re being required

to revise our priorities

reexamine our values

reevaluate what we’ve

been giving our life to

and inspect

what we think

we indeed need

or must do

a restructuring renaissance

a righteous revolution

i don’t pretend

to know the result of

i just know this small thing

is so big

we all ought

do our part

so i go in, i

stop the sprinting

put the busy to bed

wash my hands

stay smart

make strong

be kind as we react differently

consider the collective

in each choice i’m making

support practically

aiding where i can

as problems of privilege

become preposterous to deny

and make this count

i make this unprecedented halt

to life as we know it

matter

matter not just for our health

now

but for our future better

our future

that at the very least

i’m pretty sure will be

more honest

maybe even wiser

conceivably more considerate

perhaps compassionate

ideally kinder

yes that’s

a possibility

worth protecting

to me

~emily joy rosen

This poem speaks to me about the fear of unseen things and the challenge of our new reality — and how fast it all seemed to arrive (although let’s be real– scientists have been sounding alarms for a long time…while we’ve collectively oscillated somewhere between denial, worry and distraction). 

It speaks to me about going inside. Inside ourselves. Where the only real change happens. Our collective reality is but a reflection of our collective inner lives. 

It speaks to me about waking up to what we’ve been focused on, what our inner lives are about, what we’ve been giving our lives to. What’s really important? Death, and the threat of death, have the effect of putting into stark relief what matters most to us. And helps us re-order our priorities, if we let it be our teacher. 

And the poem underscores hope. “…our future, that at the very least, I’m pretty sure will be more honest, maybe even wiser…perhaps compassionate.”

May it be so.

Be well. Wash your hands. Stay connected. 

— Lisa 

Author

Lisa Wolcott

Lisa founded Wolcott Counseling & Wellness, LLC to offer the best mental wellness care in North Central Florida and beyond. Licensed in FL and CA, she’s also a clinical supervisor for Master level social workers in Florida. Lisa is a Certified Group Therapist (CGP) through the American Group Psychotherapy Association, and a Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator through The Daring Way™ an empirically based training and certification program for helping professionals, based on the research of Dr. Brené Brown. She is also a Gottman Level 1 certified couple’s therapy provider. Lisa has a passion for working with clients affected by intimate partner violence.